In my second blog entry, I wrote:
“I started a journal on September 28, 2009. Here is my first entry: Last Tuesday, I sat down with Sally (my wife) to explain that I have Parkinson’s. I have tried denying this for a little while, but the internal tremors were very strong that day and no telling when they might appear as external tremors.”
That “Last Tuesday” is one year ago today. What a difference a year makes. I have not lost sight of my blessings in life, and the Parkinson’s sufferers with whom I am in contact are a daily reminder that “what a difference a year makes” generally amounts to pain and suffering and depression.
To those who suffer daily, it is difficult to think about accepting things as they are, but I found that to be an important step in getting better. When I say acceptance, I do not mean acquiescence. From my viewpoint of Parkinson’s, acceptance is one’s acknowledgment that one has the disease. My personal view was, “I have it for some reason, and I accept that. Now, what am I going to do to get rid of it.”
I believe that when a disease is labeled incurable, those who receive the diagnosis find it virtually impossible to reach the “now, what am I going to do to get rid of it” phase because conventional wisdom says one cannot get rid of it. If you have read my earlier blog entries, you know I do not subscribe to the conventional wisdom view of Parkinson’s, and I got rid of it by what most would call unconventional methods.
Here are some thoughts:
1. Believe you can get rid of it.
2. Know you will be symptom free some time in the future.
3. Once you know you will be symptom free some time in the future, do not worry about “when” and do not worry about “what if I don’t get better.” Just have faith in yourself.
4. Believe that you have the power to heal yourself. I learned this from Dr. Sha, and I recommended it as a daily mantra, “I have the power to heal myself.”
5. Enjoy the journey to recovery. Make the most of each day doing at least one thing in furtherance of “I have the power to heal myself.”
These thoughts come with a warning. Experience tells me that when the Parkinson’s within you realizes that you know you have the power to heal yourself and that you are taking steps to get better, it will punish you. Parkinson’s is like a tenant who has failed to pay rent for a long time and you now are giving it an eviction notice. How will it respond? It will yell at you. It will damage the furniture. It will cut the electricity. It will stop up the plumbing. It will try to make you lose your resolve. Be as strong as you can because you may experience physical symptoms you have not seen in a while. The disease wants to make you think you are losing the battle. Be as strong as you can because you are winning…know it and keep the faith. Just like the non-paying tenant who receives the eviction notice, eventually, Parkinson’s will leave. Be strong, have faith, and let go of the Parkinson’s. You don’t need it.
All my best,
Howard
