Recently, a number of people have expressed that they look at themselves and their Parkinson’s with some guilt for having it, a sort of, “why me?” followed by, “because I have done something wrong in life to deserve this disease.” For those of you who have these feelings, I have learned that “I have the power to heal myself” has become a very large hurdle to overcome. Today, I provide you a new perspective on “why me?”
The way it has been expressed to me is mostly this type of scenario: “From my religious background and upbringing, I have this sense of guilt for bad things that occur in my life. Essentially, that I have committed some sin for which I am being punished, and my punishment is Parkinson’s. No matter how hard I try to do the Recipe for Recovery, and no matter how hard I try to “be” in the moment of “I have the power to heal myself,” I get despondent because some past transgression has delivered me into the realm of Parkinson’s and I question if I ever will get to leave. I feel overwhelming guilt over whatever bad thing I did in life to have landed me where I am now with Parkinson’s.”
I see it much differently. Here is how I have explained my comparison within the framework of the scenario provided above.
Two people having done the same “bad things” prior in life (and for our Eastern philosophical and religious readers, in past lives as well).
Person 1: Walks down the driveway to get the newspaper and has a heart attack and dies on the spot, past transgressions never addressed.
Person 2: Gets Parkinson’s. With Parkinson’s, Person 2 has been given the opportunity to explore past transgressions and deal with them and resolve them, thus cleaning out all “past transgressions.”
Person 1 dies without the opportunity to bring life back into balance before death. Person 2 has received a gift, a golden opportunity to bring life back into balance and to live a happy life before death.
This is what I wrote in Fighting Parkinson’s, and tremors three years ago:
“Am I grateful for having had Parkinson’s? Yes. Through that bump in the road in a life already out of balance, Parkinson’s stood as a bump at a fork in the road leaving me two choices: 1. Fix the imbalances in my life and it would go away; and 2. Do not fix the imbalances in my life and it would stay with me forever. I chose the road less traveled, I had no plan B, and every day I did the Recipe for Recovery to find balance in my life. And every day that I awoke with Parkinson’s still there, it was a reminder I still had more work to do.
However, in the end, when I awoke on June 12, 2010 with no Parkinson’s, I knew it was not coming back — I had re-balanced my soul, mind, and body, and I no longer needed the message or symptoms known as Parkinson’s as a reminder that I had more work to do.
I was finished with that part of my life, and I am grateful for that as well.”
So, instead of looking at your Parkinson’s as a punishment for some past transgression and thinking “why me?” why not adopt a new perspective. Why not adopt a new perspective that says, “Whatever good things I have done in my life to have received the gift of Parkinson’s as an opportunity to re-balance my life and live an extraordinarily happy life, I am grateful I did them, and I accept this opportunity graciously. I have the power to heal myself…I have the power to re-balance my life…I am recovery, and I am worth it!”
Okay! Now, grab onto to your new perspective (or enhanced perspective for those of you who did not have this issue), and grab onto the Recipe for for Recovery, and get balance back into your life.
You are worth it!!!
All my best,