Recently, a number of people have expressed that they look at themselves and their Parkinson’s with some guilt for having it, a sort of, “why me?” followed by, “because I have done something wrong in life to deserve this disease.” For those of you who have these feelings, I have learned that “I have the power to heal myself” has become a very large hurdle to overcome. Today, I provide you a new perspective on “why me?”
The way it has been expressed to me is mostly this type of scenario: “From my religious background and upbringing, I have this sense of guilt for bad things that occur in my life. Essentially, that I have committed some sin for which I am being punished, and my punishment is Parkinson’s. No matter how hard I try to do the Recipe for Recovery, and no matter how hard I try to “be” in the moment of “I have the power to heal myself,” I get despondent because some past transgression has delivered me into the realm of Parkinson’s and I question if I ever will get to leave. I feel overwhelming guilt over whatever bad thing I did in life to have landed me where I am now with Parkinson’s.”
I see it much differently. Here is how I have explained my comparison within the framework of the scenario provided above.
Two people having done the same “bad things” prior in life (and for our Eastern philosophical and religious readers, in past lives as well).
Person 1: Walks down the driveway to get the newspaper and has a heart attack and dies on the spot, past transgressions never addressed.
Person 2: Gets Parkinson’s. With Parkinson’s, Person 2 has been given the opportunity to explore past transgressions and deal with them and resolve them, thus cleaning out all “past transgressions.”
Person 1 dies without the opportunity to bring life back into balance before death. Person 2 has received a gift, a golden opportunity to bring life back into balance and to live a happy life before death.
This is what I wrote in Fighting Parkinson’s, and tremors three years ago:
“Am I grateful for having had Parkinson’s? Yes. Through that bump in the road in a life already out of balance, Parkinson’s stood as a bump at a fork in the road leaving me two choices: 1. Fix the imbalances in my life and it would go away; and 2. Do not fix the imbalances in my life and it would stay with me forever. I chose the road less traveled, I had no plan B, and every day I did the Recipe for Recovery to find balance in my life. And every day that I awoke with Parkinson’s still there, it was a reminder I still had more work to do.
However, in the end, when I awoke on June 12, 2010 with no Parkinson’s, I knew it was not coming back — I had re-balanced my soul, mind, and body, and I no longer needed the message or symptoms known as Parkinson’s as a reminder that I had more work to do.
I was finished with that part of my life, and I am grateful for that as well.”
So, instead of looking at your Parkinson’s as a punishment for some past transgression and thinking “why me?” why not adopt a new perspective. Why not adopt a new perspective that says, “Whatever good things I have done in my life to have received the gift of Parkinson’s as an opportunity to re-balance my life and live an extraordinarily happy life, I am grateful I did them, and I accept this opportunity graciously. I have the power to heal myself…I have the power to re-balance my life…I am recovery, and I am worth it!”
Okay! Now, grab onto to your new perspective (or enhanced perspective for those of you who did not have this issue), and grab onto the Recipe for for Recovery, and get balance back into your life.
You are worth it!!!
All my best,
Howard
A poem arrived in my in-box today…For me, it very much speaks to the messages that Howard brings us. I’ve copied the poem and an introductory comment below. It’s by my favorite American poet, Mark Nepo.
Below Our Strangeness
I believe we are all connected at the deepest and most elemental level and that experience and circumstance manipulate us away from our better selves. This poem speaks of that place.
My soul tells me, we were
all broken from the same name-
less heart, and every living thing
wakes with a piece of that original
heart aching its way into blossom.
This is why we know each other
below our strangeness, why when
we fall, we lift each other, or when
in pain, we hold each other, why
when sudden with joy, we dance
together. Life is the many pieces
of that great heart loving itself
back together.
Hi Penny
Thank you for sharing this poem. It is soooo timely for me and a reminder that we are all one when it comes down to the vastness of the void …
Beautifully profound
Angela
Thanks for the poem, Penny, and the link.
Thank you Penny it is a beautiful true poem
Thanks Howard.I have been looking at this from a karmic point of view and wondering what terrible thing I must have done but also knowing it is an opportunity to become a much better person.
Thanks also to Penny.It is a beautiful poem.
This is excellent new way to look at recovery, Thanks
Yes Parkinson’s is affording me the time , space and opportunity to grow into the authenticity of my truth. It is a luxury I probably would not have accorded myself
otherwise.
I thank you for this wake up call
To all of us and all those others ‘healing’ their stuff – we are worthy of living a dis – ease free life
In light and newfound love
Yes I agree. I never would have looked at my stuff so deeply. Or held a mirror to myself Thank you Angela
Howard! You absolutely ROCK! What you say is so true! My life now is so much richer. No way I’d go back to life before I developed the symptoms that let me know, undeniably, that something was really wrong. Like Angela, (and most everyone else following this, I suspect) I would not have taken the time…given myself the time…and made the commitment to change my life on such dramatic ways unless something shook me to the core. “Wake up!”, it said “there is work to be done! Deep, important work.” It was more important than anything else I was doing, and through the most amazing grace, you were there, Howard, showing me a path that I could follow. And follow I did…all the way to Recovery and a truer life. Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!
My love and best wishes to you and to everyone in this healing community, Marie
Marie, you rock, too! I am so inspired that I can recover, because you are a living testimony to Howard’s Recipe and it’s effectiveness. Especially effective when undertaken under Howard’s excellent guidance and instruction. Even so many months after you are recovered, you continue to be a presence to those of us journeying through Parkinson’s. It is so cool that you have stayed connected. Your experience is valuable to us! Thank you for taking time to write.
I agree xx
Thank you Marie we are all learning so much and you have reached recovery good on you. Helen
Thank you once again Howard for bringing us all together and holding the lamp. Helen
well done to all of you for taking the bold step!!!
and to my friend Helen 🙂 go girl!!
sending love and light
Margaret