In Fighting Parkinson’s, and hunting your cure! I discuss transforming the fear you create in your mind to the faith you feel in your heart. This applies not only to fear, but also to all of the negative emotions that helped your Parkinson’s come to the surface in the first place. As you enter the height of holiday season filled with crowds and impatience, and getting together with family and friends, controlling negative emotions is critical to keeping your symptoms under control and continuing with your cure. Today, let’s revisit controlling and transforming anger.
Anger. Many people ask me what to do about the anger they are feeling inside themselves. As you know, anger is at the top of my list of the three causes that bring Parkinson’s symptoms to the diagnosable surface. I have expressed it as: “1. Qi and Blood Deficiency, which is caused by emotional stress, anger, frustration, and resentment.” Part of Parkinson’s recovery requires letting go of anger. You know, that precious anger that you feel you have the right to hold, to nurture, and to call your own…that anger that, ultimately, you turn on yourself. Yes, THAT anger. You need to send it on its way.
Anger is like drinking milk that is beyond its expiration date and has gone sour. Stay with me on this one. You went to the grocery store yesterday and bought a quart of milk. Your mind was wandering and you did not look at the expiration date. You got home and threw away the receipt which went out with the garbage and was taken away early this morning. You open the milk, pour a glass, and it is sour and disgusting and starts to make you sick. You look at the expiration date and it was two weeks ago.
Anger. Here it comes. You are angry at the manufacturer for having expired milk on the shelf. You are angry at the stocking person at the store who left it on the shelf. You are angry at the cashier because she took your money when the milk was expired. Ultimately, you turn the anger on yourself because you should have checked the date and you should not have thrown out the receipt, and there will be no justice after you have been wronged.
And, whose fault is this? In the end, you decide this is your fault because you were not perfect, you could have prevented the situation, you were asleep at the switch, and now you have sour milk. At this point, you have two choices: 1. Continue to drink the milk; or 2. Let it go…throw it away.
If you continue to drink the milk, who is harmed? The manufacturer? No. The stocking person? No. The cashier? No. You? Yes. Only you are harmed. But you continue drinking the milk and harming yourself because it is your milk and you paid for it and you never will get your money back. And this is why anger is like drinking milk that is beyond its expiration date and has gone sour. You are the only one who is harmed if you do not let it go.
So, look inside yourself and visit where the anger comes from. It could be current events or events from long ago. The bottom line is this: holding onto your anger only hurts you! Forgiveness is a gift you can give yourself to help let go of anger. That’s right, a gift you can give yourself.
Whoever it is that made you angry, forgive them. By the act of forgiveness, you are taking away the power they have over you. You are giving away the negative emotions that are destroying your health and feeding your Parkinson’s. Forgiveness does not “let the person off the hook.” Whatever it is that they did to have you hanging onto anger all this time, they will have to live with themselves throughout life, and after.
However, by giving forgiveness, you release their hold on you, and you throw away the anger. Forgiveness is like saying, “I am giving back this negativity because I do not want it anymore.” And you become free from the anger attached to the words or events that caused the anger in the first place.
You do not need give the forgiveness to them personally as oftentimes the person is no longer presently in your life or has passed away. The forgiveness comes from your heart and can be given as a directed feeling from your heart during a time of quiet contemplation. If it truly comes from your heart unconditionally, it can be as simple as a feeling that says, “(Whomever), I forgive you for (whatever it is the person said or did).” Sit with the feeling and allow the previous feeling of anger to transform to compassion and forgiveness within your heart…and then let the anger go.
One more important thing to know here: At some point, since the anger comes back to you and you are directing the anger at yourself, forgiveness begins with you…be compassionate to yourself and forgive yourself for whatever it is in which you find yourself angry at you. Be compassionate and forgiving to yourself first, and you will feel so liberated in your life that finding compassion and forgiveness for others will be easier. This is a transformation that helps pave the way to you curing yourself of Parkinson’s.
Cause 1 of the causes that bring Parkinson’s symptoms to the diagnosable surface: “1. Qi and Blood Deficiency, which is caused by emotional stress, anger, frustration, and resentment.” Look at some descriptive phases for anger:
“His blood was boiling.”
“Steam was coming out of her ears.”
“His face was red with rage.”
“If looks could kill, her glare would have killed me.”
When I look at these descriptive phrases for anger, one word comes to mind: TOXIC. Anger is toxic. It is why anger negatively impacts the liver and leads to “Qi (your life energy) and Blood Deficiency.” If your blood is boiling so much that steam is coming out of your ears, it is unreasonable to believe that a weakened Parkinson’s liver getting fed impulses from a low-energy Parkinson’s brain is any match for your anger.
Give yourself the gifts of forgiveness and compassion, and let go of the anger. The anger is literally eating you up alive and it fuels your Parkinson’s. You will be amazed at the shift in your emotions when you say, “Okay, instead of choosing to be angry, I am choosing to be compassionate (first for myself, and then for the other person), and I am offering the gift of forgiveness from my heart.”
This holiday season, the first gifts you need to give are the gifts of forgiveness and compassion to yourself. Put them in a box, wrap them in beautiful paper, and top them with a lovely bow. Each time you feel anger starting to rise within you, begin the transformation by taking a deep breath and slowly opening your gift box filled with forgiveness and compassion. It is the gift you need to “re-gift” to yourself and others throughout the holiday season.
You will feel the shift from physical and emotional turmoil to spiritual calm and peace. It is a lovely transformation, and one that I highly recommend.
If the milk is sour, be forgiving and compassionate to yourself and let it go…throw it away. And smile.
You are worth it!!!
All my best,
Howard
Thank you, Howard, for the reminder of the beauty of forgiveness…. Ultimately, forgiveness is “for giving” – whether to yourself or others, the act of giving presence, compassion and love whenever anger stirs. When is anger not a desperate plea for love?
Thanks for your awesome words of wisdom.
I have been waiting for this post. Thank you.
Someone who I described the Recipe to, asked me if the advice offered would benefit healthy people as well. I answered that the moral advice and the suggestions regarding prayer would benefit any and everyone. I think that the present blog “takes the cake”. It deserves copying and passing around – and in any an every language. All honors to Howard!!!
Dear Howard: Even though I’ve been stuck recently at a new low, I’ve never lost Faith in the Power of the Recipe. Your Posts are an Oasis where I go to grow! Bless you and yours…
Words cannot do justice to my gratitude!
Oh, you are right on target again, so many overwhelming emotions at this time of year. Thank you so much . And you do not have to throw the sour milk away —— I have recipes for cake that call for sour milk, that way everyone wins. You have turned my day around, Marilyn
About a year ago when I first started doing the recipe you told me that if I could heal my soul, my mind and body would follow! I gave that much thought over the past year and gradually began identifying mentally everyone in my life one by one to whom I felt the slightest amount of anger or resentment toward and went through the process of letting it go. After reading this blog I asked myself how I was doing thus far, and I can honestly say that at this point I feel no anger towards anyone in my past. I will continue to try to keep that in check as I move forward through life. Thank you Howard for the wisdom in that great advice. It has liberated me!
Thankyou Howard for your words which feel like a golden key to unlock the door to this terrible prison i am living in
At the moment they feel like very thin words over a raging torrent of anger. But I am going to make them into strong words with persistance to build a bridge over this troubled water and let it all wash away.
Thankyou Howard and thankyou friends. We can do it!
Love to all.
Dear Mayarita, Your words touch me deeply, and remind me of how I felt when I really looked at how much anger I had stored inside. So much!!! It was daunting. the Medical Qigong for the Liver exercises that Howard gives us in the Recipe for Recovery were very helpful. While practicing them, I apologized to my liver for the damage, asked my liver to let go of the toxic load of anger and to heal itself. We were in this together, me and my liver, and Becoming protective of my liver seemed to help me keep from storing new anger and also release the old stuff. It was helpful to have that physical action combined with the intention of releasing the anger.
still today, when anger arises in me, I pat my liver, and try to soothe it. That shifts me in relation to the emotion.
Best wishes to you as you continue on your healing journey. The anger seems so powerful now, but from experience I can promise you it is not so hard to overcome.
Marie
Thankyou Marie I shall try that. At least now I feel like I have got to the root of the problem and can see a pattern. Now I realise the problem is inside me insteaf of blaming it on endless exterior circumstances. Understanding is a good place to start healing. Thankyou Howard and Marie for your wisdom.
Love to all
I am repeating out loud forgiving from the bottom of my heart to try to make it real.
Thanks Howard for the reminders. It seems as if a battle is being fought inside of me. It’s the battle between anger and forgiveness, between resentment and compassion, between the mind and the heart. I’m putting my money on the heart!
Love to all fellow travellers on the journey to recovery.
Ha! Perfect timing on that post as usual Howard! I was about to turn some curdled milk into yogurt today, but now I think I’ll just pour all my harmful thoughts down the drain and go buy some egg nog instead! Thank you Howard!
Pingback: Fighting Parkinson’s, and your best is good enough…really! | Fighting Parkinson's Drug Free